Day 3

Before I post about my day, I want to take a moment to mention something that has happened, and is in my thoughts. My niece's husband has passed away suddenly. I met him shortly after they were married this summer, and he seemed a genuine good person, a caring husband and an involved father to their one year old. I cannot imagine her grief, and I am stunned and saddened by this news.

Successful swim and run today. Cravings and crankiness have kicked in.

Day 2

Plan is still in effect. Swam yesterday and today, ran last night. 

On the one hand I feel good and strong, like I am taking care of myself, taking charge, and using my muscles as they were intended. 

On the other hand, I am dealing with cravings in what is only the second day without candy and caffeine. ALL I WANT TO EAT IS ICING. I am not taking away bread at this current moment, as I fear the voices in my head may kill me if I attempt it before Thursday. I hope to make a successful break with processed food, but if it is 80/20, I'll be happy.

December Detox

I know, with Christmas meals and treats, plus winter comfort foods, this is a difficult time to be on the Healthy Train. However, here's what I have learned from years of struggle; There is no good time. There is always a holiday, or a vacation, or stress, and I am still going to want to eat candy. But this is for my health, my happiness, and my quality of life, so I am committing to me. I've decided to start swimming every morning and running 3-4 days a week, and cut as much sugar from my diet as I can. This is what has lead to success in the past, and it is good for my heart.
Game On.

To Recap

Well, I have been unsuccessful in this, so far. I jumped off the healthy train more than I stayed on, and there is no progress to report. I have recommitted, and will try to add more in the win column.

On Track

Alright, here we are at the close of week one, although keeping track of a change that should be permanent seems tedious, at this point it is still helpful.

Cut my sugar by quite a bit, and cut caffeine completely. Think tomorrow's weigh in is going to be an improvement, and I'm feeling pretty successful all in all.

Went for a nice walk today. Runkeeper told me it was my best one ever, but I just started using the app, so it's a bit biased. My Fitness Pal has all sorts of new encouragements as well, which I love. I recently got a Samsung S5, and I tried the pedometer, the first 2 days of work I had less than 2000 steps in a day. So, that's gotta change. Today's walk was a nice 5k in the sunshine, at a meandering pace, but, I did it.

Game On.

215

I'm writing to help myself get, and stay, on what I like to call –  The Healthy Train. This is the 7000 actual try, and I’m still hopeful “this time for sure.” Hence turning to my blog to have more accountability, and possibly entertain.

Due to some extremely poor choices, at 36 and 5’4″ I find the scale reading 215. This is upsetting for a myriad of reasons, and I am committing to change it. I do not expect a quick fix, and I realize it will be difficult, but I am going to try.

Try is my new life philosophy. Sometimes I get so wrapped up in how something will go, that I won’t even attempt it. Or I procrastinate, putting it off till I feel “ready”, whatever that might mean. With weight loss I struggle to accept that thinner – a word I cringe to use – would be better. I am not saying thinner is always better, or that I intend to ever be thin, but currently, I need to be less round. For all the reasons it is hard to be heavy.

Being heavy is easy for a lot of reasons as well. And it is an easy excuse. Change is hard and sometimes I can’t convince myself it would be worth it. What would change, aside from how I personally looked, and felt. If it only matters to me, does it really matter? On good days, the answer is yes. My health matters. My happiness matters. I matter.

I was going to make a fatifesto, but it only sounded like a fun place to eat, so instead I’m just going to jot down my progress, thoughts, feelings, struggles and hopefully successes.

I’ve been very inspired by people using social media to showcase their weight loss journeys, and thought writing a blog might be a nice way for me to see, and also share, where I’ve been as I try to focus on where I’m going.

I would like to hear your stories and thoughts as well, if you would like to share them. It can be thoughts on my train, or your own, I welcome the chance to discuss, and feel it all helps stay on track.

My running coach has a saying when we start, and I don’t think she would mind if I used it here as well, so I’m going to end my ramble with a positive call to embrace the challenge.

Game On